Monday, April 6, 2015

This loss is a bit easier...

Losing a child (or two) is never easy. But this miscarriage (chemical pregnancy) is somewhat easier to deal with than my past miscarriage.

Daughter makes it easier. 

Last time, in 2011, we lost twins conceived through IVF.  We lost them at 8 and 10 weeks. 

My mom and my sister really wanted me to watch my nephew, which I normally did weekly, but I couldn't. They didn't get it. Wouldn't he make me happier?  No. At that point, we had no children of our own and not much hope. Seeing other peoples children would not help.  Seeing other peoples children made it worse. 

I'm not saying it was right. But it was how I felt. 

Now that we have a beautiful and amazing daughter, it is easier. We still weep and pray for strength, but sadness doesn't overtake us. 

We had a wonderful Easter weekend with family. Christ is risen!  Because He died for all our sins to be forgiven, we believe that we will see our two little babies (and others) in Heaven. 

We are very blessed with wonderful families. My mom and my sister (and dad) are always there for me.  When they don't know how to be there for me (like wanting me to watch my nephew) they're still trying.  They really helped us through that loss and the recent loss.  We are so blessed to have them.


  1. Wow- I've never noticed how much Daughter looks like you and Mat. It's amazing! My first adopted embie daughter looks just like my husband and I too. (The 2nd one, not so much- but she's adorable.)
    I'm so sorry for your loss- we lost several in between our 2 girls. And as I'm preparing to adopt more embryos, I'm gearing up for the frustration and emotional roller coaster that it may become. Be persistent. God knows exactly which embryo(s) will be the Perfect addition to your family!

    1. Thanks, Chelle!
      your comment really did make my day. God DOES know which embies should live here on earth with us. His plan is perfect :)